I am often asked questions like, “When did you decide to be gay?” and it drives me up the wall that people can think that such a thing can be decided. I usually respond with something like, “When did you decide to be straight? When did you decide to be a boy?”. I haven’t ‘decided’ or ‘chosen’ to be gay as much as you decided to be born a boy or girl.
Sometimes people tell me, “I used to think I might be gay because…” and I explain to them – It’s not so black and white. Why do people feel they have to fall into a pre-defined category? There is nothing to say you have to fall into discrete groups of straight, gay, bisexual, transgender… There are not 3, 4, or any finite number of sexualities; there’s a whole spectrum of them!
In reality, nobody is 100% gay or 100% straight. So long as you’re safe, comfortable and having fun, who cares what sexuality you are anyway? =]